Golden Touch Craps

Steady readers of slot articles know one thing; their chances of coming out ahead in the long run are remote, really, really remote. A big progressive win of millions would do it, of course, but bucking an estimated 50 million to one odds on those giant progressive machines just isn’t in the cards, or reel spins, for just about every slot player. Slot players know this, if not intellectually, at least instinctively.

Hope all you like but I am betting that you don’t make it. Nor will I.

So what do many slot players do? They come up with highly logical and totally incorrect ways to play the machines thinking their logic can overcome the randomness programmed into the machines. Since the machines can’t be beaten in the long run, all logical systems of play must by definition be wrong. So much for logic. Something might sound good but if it doesn’t work, it isn’t worth thinking about.

Yes, I will admit that good money management, smart selection of lower house-edge slot machines, reduction in the number of spins per minute and all of those strategies are truly helpful to keep your head and pocketbook in the game, and also your spouse from being annoyed with your play. But a logical approach to win at the one-armed bandits? Nope. Only if you can play the machines described in Jerry "Stickman’s" book Specific Slot Machines That Give the Players the Edge! can you expect to win in the long run.

So I have decided to offer to the Jackpot readership my new, unique strategy that has never been thought of before and, obviously, never tried before. It’s called "Slot Spin." Since logic cannot beat the randomness of the slot machines, what about randomness itself? Can a truly random approach to the game generate wins? Probably not but who cares? Since nothing works in the long run except "Stickman’s" machines, my strategy won’t work any worse. So it is definitely worth a try. The only thing you have to lose is your money.

Now what do I mean by randomness beating the randomness of the slot machines? Here it is – prepare yourself for true genius now – you do something random that then tells you how to play the machines you wish to play!

This strategy will work on two, three, four, five and six line machines. It won’t work on those new billion-line Australian machines created by marsupials.

Specifically take a single die and spin it randomly. Just spin it and then drop it. If it lands on the two spot, you will play two coins in the machine. If it lands on the three-spot, you play three coins. Whatever the die lands on that’s what you play. But for each upcoming spin you must spin your die first.

Now if the machine you are playing only goes up to three coins, then you ignore the die should it fall on the four, five or six spots.

Please keep in mind you must spin the die. The spinning is a key ingredient as it is in politics and in teenage logic.

Here is the logic of my non-logical system. There is a concept in physics called the spin relationship or principle (or something like that) where atoms that were in relation to each other are still in relation to each other no matter how far apart in the universe they have become. So, to make this simple so I can understand it, if one atom is spinning one way, the other atom will spin that way too. They are in some unfathomable way connected to each other.

Once you understand the spin principle then you apply that to the randomness of the slot machine. I am stating equivocally that the spin of randomness can be transferable from one random event to the other if, and this is the important if, your mind thinks about it strongly enough.

Now you have two ways to approach the "Slot Spin" principle. You can bring a die to the casino to spin in front of the machine. However, that could cause other slot players to stand around you guffawing at what an ploppy they think you are. You can ignore all of them because their strategies are losers too.

But if your public persona is such that you prefer to remain respected or ignored by other slot players, then you can do several thousand spins at home, come to the casino with sheets of paper and use these to determine how many coins you will play.

Obviously, even with my "Slot Spin" strategy you will not win every single spin of the reels. I can’t promise you that kind of performance. Actually I can’t promise you any kind of performance but my principle will certainly add another element of thrill to playing the slot machines and who knows, maybe I have uncovered the true secret to beating those machines.

If you can win at slots, well, there’s a spin I really like!